The other day I was talking to my mom about a challenging interaction I was having with a gentleman. My mom was amused at this person’s bad behavior.

I jokingly told my mother, “If you think he is so funny, maybe you should spend time with him.”

My mother quickly responded by saying, “I’d have to tell him where the dog died.”

We both had a good laugh. I remember this saying from long ago and interpreted it to mean my mom would sharply correct this person if he were in her world.

I love that my mom, especially at her age, saw herself as having the feeling of independence enough to put this person in their place.

It reminded me just how important independence is as an older adult.

Last week, the administration sent a memo seeking to pause potentially trillions of dollars in government loans, grants, and financial assistance. That memo was later rescinded, but it did create confusion and uncertainty, particularly in the nonprofit world.

While we are not sure what the future holds, a substantial amount of local Meals on Wheels funding is through the federal government, handed down to states and counties through Older Americans Act grant funding.

Each year, through Senior Concerns’ Meals On Wheels/Home Delivered Meals programs, we deliver over 65,000 meals to 450 homebound seniors. These seniors reside in Thousand Oaks, Newbury Park, Oak Park, Westlake Village and Agoura Hills.

When I consider the word “home” it conjures up a safe haven. A place where one can live alone or with loved ones and a place to enjoy with friends. It’s a place to build memories and a place where we can truly just be ourselves.

It is easy to see why aging in place, or remaining in our home as we age, has such an allure. Also, as my mom tells me, “When you get old, like I am, you just don’t like a lot of change.”

That makes a lot of sense logically until it doesn’t. Life, especially at an older age, often brings with it physical changes and sometimes cognitive ones that challenge our assumptions about our home being a safe haven.

When stairs become a problem in reaching your bedroom, bathroom or laundry room, or when you are unable to enter your bathtub due to balance issues, or you must commit to a life of social isolation because you can no longer hear the telephone or doorbell ring; these unthinkable changes can make a home a dangerous place to be.

A friend stopped by over the holidays to say hello.

I knew her from work activities, and we became friends, grabbing lunch occasionally and sharing anecdotes about our lives. She was a highly skilled individual, educated, and successful. I enjoy my time with her because our conversations are stimulating.

My friend has been retired for over a year now after planning and announcing her decision a full year in advance.

We began to talk about her old work life, and she recounted something that recently happened that upset her.

She ran into an old work acquaintance, a gentleman, who asked her (referring to her retirement), “What do you do?”